Not a super fail in the way that I binged because I did not. Super fail... well you'll see.
Woke up at 190.1. Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh. So ready to stop seeing "19-". Fuck my life.
Didn't do pilates this morning because I'm a lazy tard.
B: 1 shake
L: Tuna and dry toast
S:.... I promised Darlene (Tim's mom, aka Billy's "other mother") I would come for dinner at least once before Billy came home... We had taco salad.
Soooo then there were dainties for dessert, and I did pretty well, I'm proud of myself actually, but I could have had none.
Stayed there for a while, played a card game, shot the shit. Talked about marriage... Ya know how I've totally brushed all that talk off... Of course it came up in conversation. Hollee said "how's he going to top $350 shoes next year?" and Tim's mom said "diamonds". well I finally just said "ya know what, if that's where this relationship lead I would be totally happy" and Darlene said "so would I".
Enough boy stuff. Did not end up drinking wine at Kat's. That's alright. I wasn't really feeling it. Tomorrow I'm going to help Tim and Hollee make sushi before the New Years Eve/hot tub party we're going to. Shit... I'm fat and I'm going to be in a swim suit in front of people. ... Gonna have to suck it in. Not that it will be an issue.. I have cute little shorts to wear over my bottoms and the top part is kinda loose around the midsection because it's too big on me. And it really showcases my boobs.
I'm going to sleep at my place tonight. I miss my apartment and my dogless bed. The novelty of snuggling with Gracie has worn off and the little dog Bella just annoys me. There's so much natural sunlight in my home, I find myself getting restless and sad in Billy's house. Not enough big windows. If I am ever far enough out of student debt, and I buy a house, it must have large windows. Like the bungalow I grew up in. So bright and sunny all the time.
Anywho. Going to Jordana's for a bit to chill while they be drinkin'. I be not drinkin' because I want to drive home tonight. I'm too poor to afford a cab (because of that damn ps3), and operation red nose isn't running tonight. That and I want to get a good sleep in my own bed tonight. I don't know where I'm sleeping tomorrow night (my place or Billy's... I'll be pretty schmammed by the time operation red nose picks me up).
Kinda liking this regular posting. I feel like it's keeping me in touch with my goals... and my posts are a lot shorter.
This is the background on my phone right now. There is a table at Jordana's that everyone writes on. ... A few weekends ago, Billy wrote this on the table and didn't say anything and when I looked at it just smiled. When I asked who wrote it, he grinned and said "I did". (Billdo is one of his nicknames... every male here has a nickname.)
Regular posts are always good, im also working on that :D
ReplyDeleteThe photo is cute.
Dont worry about the weight, the new year starts tomorrow and it comes with a new start :D