Lame date

Hi all,

Still don't know how much I weigh.... scale is still in Flin Flon. I considered taking off all my clothes and weighing myself at cello guys apartmnet/dorm room... but that would be a weird thing to do on a first date.

Alright. How did the date go you ask? LAME. He totally monopolized conversation, which I'm ok with but it was soooo boring. Like I felt like we'd been standing in his room talking for 40 minutes... and it had only been 20. I just didn't feel anything. On the way to sushi, I tried to force my brain to find him sexy... but he carried a fricken' murse around with us... it was pretty much a verticle fanny pack. REALLY? I offered to put it inside my ginormous purse. He declined, saying he likes to cary his stuff. He must have felt it was going alright, because we went for ice cream afterwards. (90000035353 calories later...). Then we went back to drink wine and watch Venture Brothers. Which I find hilarious, but his laugh was just soooooo feminine.. turn-off. That and he moved at the fucking pace of a snail. Like 4 episodes in and he asks if I want to switch spots on the couch... 2 more episodes and he asks if I "would be interested in a backrub or something". He finally gets me between his legs... and then gives me this massage, which was the equivalent to what my massage therapist does.. but without any massage oil. After the next episode I say "oi. I'm sleepy" and he says "me too" and before he can mention anything else.. i say "I think I'm going to go home and get some shut eye". hahahahahaha. Then what do i do? I text muscles and ask him how his night is going. I spend the next hour flittering around the south end of the city, getting gas, pulling over to text message. He says they're going to grind on chics at the bar. I tell him I don't care so long as I get a piece of that delicious ass on Saturday night. :D (I'm really classsy). At 2am he texts me asking if he can come over... he's drunk. He wants to fuck me... I tell him I have a family thing I have to wake up for. (also my apartment is in fucking shambles and my period had it's little one day thingy to let me know it's coming... bad for casual sex lol). He says he'll text me tomorrow (today) after they're done golfing and tells me which bar they're going to as if it were his suggestion (i'm good at making them think that). Then he texts me saying he can't wait to grind up on me and (insert comment too dirty for the internet). :P Hahahaha. Woke up at 6:00am... fucking chipmunk outside my window. Now I'm trying to pack and make my apartment presentable so that if bestie comes to pre-game here it's not a disaster... and of course I don't want muscles to think I live in a pig sty.

Ooooo. Funny story. I was texting with a boy I dated in high school (one with an ego the size of an elephant's schlong.....). Why do my ex's keep popping up? Drummer guy just moved in a 10 minute walk from my place haha. Anywho, he is taking a summer course that ended up being my major (music for young children) and it started with him asking for advice. He asked what my weekend plans were, I told him he should come dancing. He's always fun at the club. He texts me "bow chica wow wow".... and then says that was to the wrong person. I ask if he thinks he's going to bow chica wow wow me...he says "well yeah". I tell him good luck, he'd better bring his a-game. He has stiff competition. Hahahahah. He says "I'm not competetive" I say good luck then. :D

Monday I have a date with an actual charmer from high school. :D He recently lost 70 pounds!! and tooooooooned the fuck up!! I told him to update his facebook picture.... he snapped one and emailed it to me instead. I was like "whoaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. That is not the same person I saw last time!". Haha. So far our text conversations have been interesting. I wonder if he'll try anything while we're out? Drinks and app's :D (more calories I shouldn't consume). Good thing I can't afford groceries at the moment.

As for today, today is my grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary party!! My aunt from the states is up, and I can't wait to see the whole fam dam... which I was informed this morning was an archaic term... the correct one is apparently Fam Jam... stupid twitter lol.

Anywho. It's 7:20 am and I've only packed half a box so far... so I'd better get on that!!!
Love you ladies lots and lots. XOXOXOOXOXOXOXOXOXO :P XO (that was a sloppy kiss at the end.... a pre-cursor for what I hope happens tonight... i'm a slut haha)