A good weekend

Happy Monday!

Alright. Still 190. Gah. But I have a plan! This summer I was drinking meal replacements for 2 of my meal so I bought some again. They're not quality ones but they're low calorie, so even if I cook a big supper for Billy when he comes over, I can still lose!!! Fuck I'm surprised I haven't gained weight dating him. We eat all the fucking time! haha. :( lol

Ok. Sooooo this weekend.. I decided that I am just going to let myself fall into this relationship and be surrounded by his affection and ya know what? Something changed :) Suddenly he was extra affectionate and cutesy :) We went to Loreena's birthday party at Jordana's. Jordana has a table that people write on all the time, it's kinda funny. I looked down and he had written "Billdo + Vanessa" on the table. :) Aaaaaand ya know how I was a little petrubed that there aren't any pictures of us? And I'm even more distubed that Loreena constantly takes pictures of her and Billy, or her and I or other people but will never take a picture that has Billy and I in it together. (at halloween we were carving pumpkins and she took a picture of me with my pumkin and cut him out, then took a picture of him carving and cut me out... we were sitting right next to each other) Well he took one of us with his cell phone :D :D :D And he totally initiated it! I texted my friend Kat like right after it happened I was so excited. Then we went to the bar and he was all cutesy with his arm around me. Then the end of the bar came and they always play slow songs and he pulls me to the dance floor because he wants to dance with me :) (which we hadn't been doing previously at the bar) The last time we went to the bar he pulled me to dance with him at the end of the night too, but this time he was holding me close and singing to me. I'm fairly certain they played that Bon Jovi song that goes "Aaaaand  I, will looooove you, baaabyyy, aaaaaaaaaaaaaalllways" and a couple others that generally expressed the same sentiment. He even looked me in the eye whilst singing these things. I may have said "no you don't" the first time he sang "I love you" and smiled at him. Oh god, it's coming. This boy is falling in love with me. I think I'm ok with that. I've stopped denying it to other people and teachers at my school, and he's coming to my staff Christmas party soooo cat will be out of the bag anyway. Anywho, after the bar we went to another party. Shortly after we got there, I look over and Loreena is sitting on his lap.... I know nothing would ever happen between them and they're best friends or whatever, and ya know, I didn't make a stink when he wanted to drink beer at her place on a Monday because they both had Tuesday off, and he crashed there, but this just pissed me off. She sometimes acts like I'm not there, or whatever, and I'm sure she really likes me, but I get it, I'm stepping on what she may consider her territory... wellllll I snapped. After him being so nice and affectionate I was not having this. I mean, like I said, they may be best friends but there is a line. I need there to be a line. It has to exist. If there isn't a line, well why shouldn't she just take off her clothes, or put her mouth on his dick? (which would never happen but you know what I mean) I yelled at her from across the room "LOREENA.... Get off my FUCKING boyfriend!". She got all huffy and packed up her shit and left. She wouldn't look at me when she walked by me. I held my ground and stayed where I was... I didn't want to go crawling over to him. He came over and explained to me that it was his fault. Apparently they were playing a drinking game and she wanted to play and he didn't see any extra chairs around so he told her to sit on his knee. He apologized and said he hadn't thought about it before he did it. He's really good for that, when he does something that upsets me, he thinks about it from my point of view and always apologizes for whatever it was. *sigh* clearly I have it bad for this boy.

Sunday was low key. We woke up, had some awesome morning sex, had some bacon and eggs, chilled, then rented a movie in the evening. Fell asleep at 9:30ish.... just went to sleep at his house. :) Talked to his mom in the morning as I was leaving, that wasn't awkward... no for real. It wasn't. I love his Mom, and the rest of his family too.

Soooo surprise/Christmas updates. Originally I thought he was getting me mukluks for Christmas because he mentioned it in July and then talked about it every time I said how cold it was outside.... but then yesterday he told me that he bought tickets for a draw for a pair of mukluks.... what could he possibly have spent 100-200 on? Whatever it is he says it's well worth it and I'm going to love it. I don't know how he knows what to get me... I've never mentioned anything about what I'd like to get for Christmas... And my surprise? He says if he tells me when I'm getting it, it will be obvious. The only thing I can think of is maybe he's coming to my Christmas concert and bringing me flowers after? I have noooo idea. And he's still not giving me any hints, and he hasn't told anyone else either. Time knows what I'm getting for Christmas but not what my surprise is.... Yeesh. This is driving me crazy!!

Oooo, but I have a surprise for him! I got this card from etsy.com

Hilarious because he loves bacon, and on the inside it said "I'm achin' for your bacon". Which I think I'm going to give him when he gets home from Cuba. Underneath I'm going to write "can we do it now?". hahahahahaha.

Ok. I'm done gushing about the boy... for now. Sorry to submit you all to this squishy love talk, but I have to talk about something if I'm going to continue being fat (until my meal replacement shake plan works... If that doesn't work, I'm going back to not eating... )

Anywho, shower time for me, we're going to attempt to watch another movie tonight... fingers crossed we make it through this one haha. I hate feeling like I'm taking advantage of his mothers kindness when I sleep there. (ack, there I go, talking about him again)

Ok. .. plan. . eat less... drink shake.. stop being fat. Oh, in January I'm going to join the yoga class that starts then :) Hopefully I'll be able to grab a decent exercise mat and I can go back to doing pilates in the morning. I've been walking more than driving on the weekends and slowly cutting down the amount of food I eat. Wish me luck... I'm still not caught up on blogs :( but I'm working on it. I also haven't sent the journals I was going to ... but I bought american stamps so I will be able to. Now I just have to stop being lazy.

OOOOOooOO I almost forgot. 1 week until my first Christmas concert. Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeebus I'm starting to freak out a little bit!!! AAAAAAAAAAAHHH. I'm sure it will go fine, people will be helping me, but still. I'm nervous... it's my first time (that's what she said).

Anywho, I'm out. Love you lovelies! Here are some recently (today) snapped pics of my drive through town. They're not the best but you can kind of see how pretty the town is. :)

 

And here is me last weekend before a church dinner :)