Oh fuck. Whatever good I've done in the last few days has been undone by two days of binging. My self confidence issues and worries about my relationship ending suddenly without any notice or hints have manifested themselves through food. That and all those plans I had to tell Billy I love him... that weighed heavily on my mind. Then I talked to my aunt and I told her I'd rather him say it first, and she said "so wait then. You clearly both love each other by your actions". And guess what.. no more psycho, "OMG DOES HE LOVE ME OR DOES HE HATE ME AND WANT TO DUMP ME" mentality. I asked him if he was mad at me yesterday because he didn't stay over (which usually happens on Saturdays) and he said absolutely not, everything is wonderful. And it is. Our only problems are me being insecure... and me being fat lol.
I have NOOOO idea how much I weigh. I'm too scared to look. I'm going to wait until Friday to check. Luckily yoga is supposed to start this week along with dodgeball. And it's hard to binge eat while at school, because ya know, I'm supposed to be teaching. ... Ugh. tomorrow will be shitty. It's 2am and I'm finally going to bed... and I have to get up at 7 to make my day ready because I did absolutely NO planning over my break. Yeesh. I suck at this teacher game. :P
Anywho. Night lovelies. I hope you all ate less than I did this weekend.
XO
I probably ate the same amount, if not more. I thought I was getting sick, and this translates to EAT EVERYTHING IN SIGHT! *facepalm*
ReplyDeleteI hope things go well for you both. This had better be only thinking-it-over time for him or I'' come round and give him a kick up the arse!
Love you xoxoxo!